Joie De Vire
by Aviator39
Summary: :: Sometimes home is two eyes and heartbeat :: For Rafael Barba, the most important person in his life is his daughter Carina, and vice versa. With Rafael's abusive boyfriend behind bars, death threats and a malicious stalker hanging over their heads and a hidden danger ahead - can the Barba's stay strong and learn to lean on family.
1. Chapter 1

Copyright (c) 2016 by Aviator39 under the Copyright Act of 1978 which states that works written under a pseudonym are protected for 95 years after publication or 120 years from creation, whichever is shorter. Stealing and/or plagiarize any aspect of this story is grounds to sue you! You have been warned. You will be reported if you violate this Copyright.

* * *

 **Joie De Vivre**

 **(noun) a delight in being alive; keen, carefree enjoyment of living**

* * *

 _A sinking feeling settled in his stomach as soon as the plate slipped out of his hand, knowing full well that Adam would hear the shatter of the porcelain from the living room. He stared at the shattered pieces of plate that lay on the slate tiled floor of their shared apartment and waited, fear making his chest tight._

 _Soon, Adam's shadow appeared in the entrance to the kitchen, his glass of scotch still in hand. "You stupid fuck!" Adam hissed, setting his drink down before pacing over to Barba. A violent slap caught the ADA across the face, but Rafael remained emotionless despite the tears forming in his eyes. He prayed that God was on his side, that his boyfriend's anger would simmer out and the attack would end – everything would go back to normal._

 _Rafael was all too familiar with the predictable pattern that had clung to him since childhood, and he knew how to handle this situation. Don't cry. Don't beg and don't apologize – at least until later. The only thing he didn't know, was how_ _ **not**_ _to enrage the people in his life; be it Adam or his father in the past. The only person who never seemed to get mad at him was Carina._

 _Although his father had been locked up for years, he and Adam had much in common – probably too much in common. Rafael was a constant source of anger and frustration to Adam, just he had been for his father. And just like his father, Adam was obsessed with every move Rafael and his daughter made. And it was that obsession that finally tipped Adam's temper over the edge – broken plate be damned. A series of hang-ups and calls from blocked numbers – no doubt having to do with Rafael still receiving death threats – but it had been enough to convince Adam that the man who had flirted with Rafael at lunch earlier that day was the one calling._

" _You gave him your number, didn't you?" Adam accused lowly as he grabbed Rafael by the collar of his Armani shirt and yanked him closer. "You gave it to that cop I saw you having lunch with, didn't you?"_

 _Rafael shook his head, opting to remain mute._

 _Another slap, this time followed by a backhand that had Adam's college ring leaving a shallow cut in Barba's right cheek. "Then who's calling with a blocked number?" Adam questioned, shaking Rafael slightly. "And don't give any of that pathetic crap about you receiving death threats."_

" _I don't know." Rafael answered softly. "I don't know who it is."_

 _Adam shook his, the action being east as he had a good five inches on Rafael. "Why are you lying to me?" He shouted, slamming Rafael back against the counter before crowding him. "Does he know what a fucking pathetic loser you are? Hell, I don't even know why I put up with you."_

 _Rafael closed his eyes, readying himself for the next slap…only it never came._

* * *

His eyes snapped open, chest heaving with every breath as he turned his head to focus on the tear-blurred figure standing in the doorway of his bedroom. "Did I wake you?" Rafael asked, leaning up on one elbow while he used the other hand to scrub the tears from his eyes as he finally managed to take in his daughter standing there.

"No." Carina's smile was gentle if a bit broken. "Your alarm went off if you're wondering what woke you." She murmured before padding over to the side of the bed and resetting the alarm clock.

Carina perched on the edge of the mattress, brushing sweat-damp hair off her father's forehead. "Nightmare?" The word was both a statement and question all at once, and Rafael nodded. "But not as bad as it could've been." She added with a soft smile.

"When did you learn to read minds?" Rafael asked tiredly and sighed before pushing himself to his feet, dislodging Carina in the process. "Is there coffee?"

Carina shook her head as she ran a hand through her thick, espresso colored hair. "Yes, there's coffee. It should be done by the time you finish showering." She paused as she paced over to his walk-in closet and began flicking through his suits. "As for the mind reading…it's a gift." A playful smile on her features as she laid a dark navy blue , three-piece suit, pale pink tie, navy suspenders and a white dress shirt on the bed. "It's your first day back – wear this."

"Yes, ma'am." Rafael teased. "I'm guessing you want me to make a good impression on my first day back?" He questioned, giving his daughter a meaningful look.

"The only impression you need to make is that you're a badass – which everyone already knows." She replied firmly and placed her hands on his shoulder, tilting her chin up slightly to compensate for the slight height difference. "You are ADA Rafael Barba who graduated Cum Laude from Harvard Law, who isn't afraid of taking the police to trial and survived a trial against an abusive boyfriend that would've broken a lesser man."

Rafael swallowed, mind flashing back to two weeks ago when the jury had finally come back with the verdict – guilty. He didn't think he had ever felt so relieved in his entire life – not because his life was out of danger, but because it meant Adam would never lay a hand on his daughter like he'd threatened to.

"You make me sound a lot tougher than I am." He muttered, finally noticing the worried look Carina was giving him. "I wouldn't have survived that trial without you…and the squad."

Carina shrugged noncommittally and wrapped him in a tight hug, mindful of his still healing bruises. "I just provided moral support. You did the heavy lifting." She murmured and pulled away, walking towards the bedroom door. "Breakfast'll be ready when you're done."

* * *

"Rafael, bring your daughter to work day?" DA Laura Ackerly asked as she passed the pair in the hallway of the courthouse, smiling warmly at Carina who smiled back.

Rafael chuckled lightly as he adjusted the grip on his briefcase. "Something like that." He answered politely as he turned to unlock his office. "I figured I'd need some help sorting through everything."

Laura nodded, shifting the files in her arms. "It's good to have you back." She said, giving Rafael's assistant Carmen a small smile as they passed her. "This courthouse has been too quiet without your snark."

"I'm sure it has been." Carina laughed warmly, hazel eyes shining as she shrugged off her coat and hung it on the coat rack before pulling open the shutters to let the December sunlight filter in, before glancing at the stacks of folders covering her father's desk and clicked her tongue. "Looks like we have a lot of work to do."

"I'll let you get to it then." Laura hummed and exited the office, heels clicking down the hallway.

Carina puffed out her cheeks as she tossed her caramel colored curls over one shoulder. "Well, I already know we're going to have to order in for lunch." She quipped as she thumbed through one stack of files. "Most of these just need your signature before they get filed away." She flicked her fingers along the many 'sign here' post-its sticking out of the folders.

"Oh, joy." Rafael deadpanned, ignoring the snicker from Carmen and instead rolled his eyes as he pulled out the Mont Blanc pen from his jacket. "Give me the first one."

They worked until lunch in silence, Rafael finally caving when his hand began to cramp from signing so many papers. "That's it – I surrender. The paper wins!" He conceded, earning a warm chuckle from his daughter.

"Rafael Barba conquered by the pen." Carina laughed, unlocking her phone as it beeped with a message alert.

 **Shall we play a game? You don't know who I am, but I know who you are. And I know what you'd do to keep Daddy safe. Better be careful out there. –A**

"Carina?" Rafael asked, brow creasing in concern as he watched his daughter's face pale rapidly before she sunk down onto the couch. "Carina, what does that text say?"

She shook her head, swallowing around the lump in her throat and doing her best to ignore the dread that had settled in her stomach like a lead weight. "It's another death threat…I think." Carina managed after a few moments. "It's signed 'A'."

Barba blanched, his stomach rolling and threatening to bring up his breakfast. "'A' as in Adam?" He questioned, lowering his voice – mindful of Carmen's sharp ears.

"I don't know!" Carina hissed, standing and shoving her hands through her hair before flinging her phone against the couch. "If it's not the same people that've been threatening you, then someone else has joined in on their sick game." She pinched the bridge of her nose before inhaling deeply. "We need to tell Liv."

Her phone beeped again and Carina unlocked it with a slightly shaky hand.

 **I know all your secrets. Are you sure you want to go to SVU? -A**

Rafael took one look at the phone before grabbing both their coats. "We're going to SVU." He stated as he tossed Carina her coat. "Now!"

* * *

"Well look what the cat dragged in." Carisi joked as Rafael and Carina entered the squad room. "It's good to have you back Counsellor." He grinned, motioning for Liv to come out of her office.

Rafael gave Liv a half-hearted and tight smile. "As glad as I am to be back, this isn't a social call." He muttered as he glanced at Carina, concern etched into his features.

"What happened?" Amanda asked, her lingering Southern accent slipping through as she got up from her desk to join the growing huddle around the Barba's. "Has Adam tried to contact you from Green Haven? You know he's not allowed to do that."

Carina licked her lips and smiled wanly. "The death threats have started again." She said plainly. "I mean, my dad's still getting them. But, they've started up again for me."

She jumped as her phone went off, hesitating slightly before taking it out of her coat pocket and unlocking it.

 **Really, Carina? Running to the cops – what makes you think I'm not one of them. You'll know who I am soon enough. Watch your back. _BANG!_ –A**

Carina covered her mouth with her free hand before handing the phone to Liv, who took one look at the message before her expression darkened. "The signature's obviously meant to make you think it's Adam." She stated lowly, mindful of the other officers around them – she was sure they were all good people, but Carina was a celebrity, and people always wanted dirt on celebrities. "Let's go to my office."

The others nodded, Rafael keeping one arm wrapped around his daughter's waist as they followed the squad into Liv's office. "It's bad enough that they threaten me and Carina lives with me." Barba hissed once the door shut behind them. "It's another thing entirely when they single out my daughter."

"I'm standing right here, Papí." Carina mumbled as she leaned back against the edge of Liv's desk. "Let's not talk like I'm not in the room." She paused and tapped one booted foot against the desk. "Besides it's not the first time I've had a stalker."

Amaro turned to look at her. "You didn't tell us that." He stated, coming off more accusatory than he meant to.

Carina leveled him with an even stare. "It wasn't any of your business – it wasn't anyone's business." She answered lowly. "It was handled and the person responsible was dealt with."

"Okay, but this sicko clearly has it out for you." Fin muttered. "My advice would be to keep the phone here and see if TARU can get a trace on the texts."

Carina groaned, ignoring the disapproving look from her father. "I cannot go around without a phone." She insisted and crossed her arms over her chest. "It's like going around without a brain."

"She's got a point. Lieu." Nick interjected. "Not about the whole 'brain' thing, but about keeping her phone." He waved a hand nonchalantly and licked his lips. "We can have TARU tap her phone, that way we can see any texts that come in and listen to any relevant phone calls."

Rafael shook his head, resting his chin on the back of one hand. "We already have a police detail following us around, stationed outside our apartment, you've bugged our home just in case something happens." He stated harshly. "How many more violations of privacy are we going to have to put up with?"

"I know it's a lot to deal with, Barba." Liv placated, glancing around at the others. "We all know that you and Carina are private people by nature and we're doing our best to protect that privacy, especially given how much of Carina's life is already public knowledge." She paused and ran a hand through her hair. "But there's only so much we can do as long as both of your lives are being threatened."

Rafael opened his mouth to object but was cut off by Carina. "It's fine, Papi." She insisted, giving him an encouraging smile as she spun her phone around in one hand. "Get TARU up here and they can tap my phone. It's not like you guys haven't heard everything anyway." Her tone was resigned and she sighed, crossing her arms over her chest while giving the others an expectant look.

"'Aight then," Fin muttered and pulled out his phone. "I'll go make the call." He finished before stepping out of Liv's office, phone pressed to his ear.

Carina pinched the bridge of her nose, hoping to stave off an impending headache. "Has Heredio told you anything yet?" She questioned tiredly.

"Nope, piece of crap is keeping his mouth shut." Dodds grumbled, clearly still bitter over nearly dying not three months ago. "He thinks his bosses will protect him – seems to have convinced himself that he's valuable."

"Oh joy, he's developed an ego." Rafael deadpanned and sighed. "Keep trying, because as much as I enjoy their company, I'd like to see the tail lights of the detail sooner rather than later."

Fin poked his head back in the office. "TARU's here."

Carisi raised an eyebrow. "That was fast." He commented.

"Guess he was already in the building." Fin shrugged noncommittally. "That and he said something about his daughter being a fan and wanting an autograph. Sorry, C."

Carina laughed lightly, a small smile gracing her features. "It's fine, Fin. I'm always happy to give my fans what I can."

The group laughed good-heartedly before filing back out into the squad room where the TARU tech was waiting. "What did you want me to sign?" Carina asked, a practiced smile on her lips as she handed her Blackberry Priv to the tech.

The tech grinned before pulling out a rolled up poster from inside his jacket. "My daughter asked me to pick this up during my lunch break," He paused and unrolled the poster - it was one of Carina's latest headshots for Seventeen. "She says you're her idol – wants to grow up to be just like you. Her name's Meghan."

Carina nodded, signing the poster with a well-practiced flourish of her hand as the TARU tech popped the back of her phone open and inserted the bug and text reader.

"This'll keep track of every incoming and outgoing call and text that this phone gets." He explained as he rolled up the signed poster and stuffed it back in his jacket. "Congratulations, you now have complete access to the private life of America's sweetheart."

Liv gave the tech an appreciative if exasperated look as he exited the squad room before looking over at Carina whose expression was a mix of annoyance and resignation. "I know you're not thrilled about this Carina, but it's the best chance we have at catching whoever's doing this." She explained, glancing at Barba who wore a similar expression to his daughter – they were both at their wit's end and she couldn't blame them. A little over a year of death threats and stalking would do that to a person.

"You get that we're doing this to help you, right?" Nick asked, a concerned look taking over his features as he looked around at the others. Rollins and Fin were their usual shade of neutral, but Carisi looked like he wanted to wrap the Barba's in a hug and never let them go, while Mike had something between a scowl and a worried frown on his face.

Carina shrugged before slipping her phone back into her coat pocket and brushing her bangs out of her eyes. "Yeah, sure, whatever – I just want it to be over. Sooner rather than later." She snipped, lips twisting in an uncharacteristic sneer as she looked down at the ground. "I just – it's almost Christmas, and I had hoped all this would be over by now."

She paused and gave the others a meaningful look. "I mean I know the police detail is there to protect my dad and I, but how do we know they aren't part of the group that's been threatening us?" Shaking her head, she sighed heavily and ran a hand through her hair. "Neither of us are exactly popular with the NYPD at the moment."

"We're gonna get whoever is behind this." Amanda answered firmly, determination etched in her every feature. "Even if it means going after the brass – we'll end it soon."

The others voiced their agreements, causing Barba to let a small, genuine smile slip. "And please, no one get shot." He gave Mike a meaningful look. "Do your jobs, but for God's sake we don't need anyone dying for us."

"We'll be careful Counsellor, don't you worry." Sonny replied, giving the ADA an encouraging smile.

Carina tucked her hands into the pockets of her jeans, scuffing her feet against the linoleum floor. "Now if there's anything else you guys need we'll be in my dad's office working our way through the stacks of folders on his desk." She smirked and cocked one hip. "He's already been conquered by the pen once today, so we'll see how he holds out."

A wave of light laughter filtered through the group much to Barba's chagrin. "You know where to find us." Barba commented as he guided Carina towards the squad room exit.

Carina looked down when her phone beeped as they exited the precinct. "Oh, please not again." She breathed and unlocked the device.

 **You think you're safe on the inside, but guess where I am? You'll be seeing me soon, bitch. – A**

"Another threat?" Rafael asked, moving closer to get a look at the phone. "They're gutsy, I'll give them that."

"I can handle the death threats. I can handle whoever this 'A' is." Carina remarked and sighed through her nose. "But I just can't have anything else go wrong. At least not until after Christmas. I refuse to have Christmas ruined."

Rafael chuckled as he unlocked the matte black Audi r8 and sliding into the driver's seat. "I'll second that." He paused and revved the engine before pulling away from the curb and into the flow traffic. "I was thinking that we should stay home this Christmas. I don't think I'm in the best shape for the slopes in Gstaad."

"Sounds like a plan." Carina agreed, smiling widely as the city zipped by them – the mysterious 'A' forgotten for now.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading! I**


	2. Chapter 2

Copyright (c) 2016 by Aviator39 under the Copyright Act of 1978 which states that works written under a pseudonym are protected for 95 years after publication or 120 years from creation, whichever is shorter. Stealing and/or plagiarize any aspect of this story is grounds to sue you! You have been warned. You will be reported if you violate this Copyright.

* * *

 **Elysian**

 **(adjective) beautiful or creative; divinely inspired; peaceful and perfect**

* * *

Rafael stared out of the floor to ceiling windows that made up most of the outer walls of their apartment at One Madison. Never in his wildest dreams did he think he'd ever live like this, even with his generous salary from the DA's office. But he guessed it helped to have a daughter who had money being thrown at her from every direction: tv & movie studios, fashion designers, photographers, magazines, etc.

"Your face is going to get stuck like that, you know." Carina commented, pulling him out of his thoughts. "Trust me, it wouldn't be an attractive look for you." She huffed a laugh before wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her chin on his shoulder. "You're tense."

He shrugged, relaxing minutely as her arms tightened their grip on him. "I should've known better – taking on the Terrence Reynolds case. I knew it would put us in the crosshairs of the NYPD." Rafael sighed wearily, fingers tapping an erratic staccato on his leg. "I've put _you_ in danger. God, how could I be so stupid?"

"Hey!" Carina interjected sharply and spun him around to face her. "You did your job, and you did it brilliantly. You got justice for Terrence Reynolds and his family." She took a breath and gave him a hard stare. "The fact that I'm being threatened isn't your fault. It's the fault of whoever is behind this. It was their choice to drag me into this – not yours'...entiendes?"

Rafael gave his daughter a pained look and sighed, looking away from her imploring gaze. "You are so much stronger than me, do you know that?" He breathed and scrubbed a hand down his face. "And frankly, I don't really know what I would do without you."

Carina snickered, clapping a hand over her mouth before it could turn into a full blown laugh. "You wouldn't know what to do with yourself." She giggled softly, hazel eyes dancing. "Like, for reals, you'd be lost without me."

"That I would be." He managed a weak laugh before stuffing his hands in his pockets, brooding gaze returning to the city skyline outside the windows.

"We'll get through this." Carina murmured, pressing a kiss to his cheek and wrapping her arms around him tightly. "We're survivors, always have been."

* * *

 _Her eyes bugged as black spots danced across her vision as her grandfather tightened the belt around her neck, the buckle biting harshly into the tender skin of her neck. "I will not allow my granddaughter to be corrupted as well." Ignacio hissed as he glared down at Carina, her small hands clawing futilely at the leather belt. "Devil child! I will beat the impurity from you, so help me."_

 _He relaxed his grip and Carina sucked in a lungful of stale air. How long had it been since her grandfather had "picked" her up from school? Hours? Days? It was impossible to tell with the blacked-out windows of whatever building she was being kept it. The only light came from the blindingly bright floodlights Ignacio had set up around the perimeter._

" _Abeulo por favor, no hagas esto. (Grandpa please, you don't have to do this)." Carina pleaded, hazel eyes shiny with tears and imploring as she scooted backward on her bum away from her grandfather._

 _The belt was loose around her neck as Ignacio lunged at her, face bright red and twisted with righteous rage. "I already have a faggot for a son. I will not allow him to further corrupt you!" He roared, yanking the belt impossibly tight before tearing his granddaughter's dress down the middle. "I didn't want it to come to this. No me dejas otra opción. (You're not giving me an option)."_

 _The pain of him entering her dry was like nothing Carina had ever experienced. It was so much worse than when he canned her. Worse than when he threw her down the stairs and kicked the breath from her lungs. And it was a hundred times worse than the so-called exorcism he and Lucia had forced on her at the hands of Father Fernando._

" _Lucia and I will not have another child of the Devil in our house!" Ignacio shouted as he continued to pound into her, blood slicking his way and coating the insides of her ten-year-old thighs. "If I cannot beat the Devil from you, then I will rape him from you." He hissed, forcing a kiss on her. "See if this makes you think about wanting to be with a woman again."_

 _Carina screamed._

* * *

Rafael's eyes shot open the minute the first scream permeated the silence of the apartment, the noise for once not coming from him. "Carina?!" He called out as he pushed himself out of bed and half-ran-half-walked through the living room to his daughter's room, trying the handle and surprised to find it unlocked.

He pushed open the door, the knob banging against the wall harshly but his focus was on his daughter who lay thrashing in bed, legs tangled in the sheets as she screamed.

"Carina!" Rafael shouted, shaking her shoulders harshly as her eyes shot open. "It's just a dream, hija." He pulled her into his arms, tucking her head beneath his chin and rocking back-and-forth slightly. "You're okay….you're okay."

Carina's breathing hitched, the sobs making her chest heave and her throat constrict painfully. "Four, five, six…eleven…one…nine." She murmured to herself as her breathing slowed and her sobs subsided. "That was a bad one."

Rafael nodded mutely and tightened his grip on his daughter, finally relaxing as he felt the now steady beating of her heart. "You want to tell me about it?" He asked gently before pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

"Maybe later." She answered lowly and glanced at the clock on her bedside table – 6:30am. "It's time for us to get going anyway." Carina muttered and unplugged her phone before turning it on, groaning as it began to ding with incoming messages.

 **I'm everywhere, and soon you'll be nowhere. This little bitch better watch her back. - A**

 **Does the squad know how close you and Daddy are? I'd bet they'd love to. I think I'll send them this. – A**

Beneath the messages was a picture of Rafael and Carina, taken during the summer if their clothing was anything to go by. They were in Rafael's old apartment, lying on the couch with Rafael lying on top of her fast asleep. Carina had been doing a photoshoot of her home life, and her father had simple fallen sleep on top of her after being up for 36 hours straight. The image itself was completely innocent, but they both knew that everyone interpreted things differently.

"This doesn't mean anything." Rafael stated firmly even as he stood, dislodging his daughter from his lap. "Whatever this 'A' hopes to gain by sending that to the squad, clearly hasn't done their research." He added, running a hand through his still disheveled hair.

Licking her lips, Carina nodded, unlocking the phone as another message came in – it was Olivia.

 **Texted your Dad, but he didn't answer. Meet at SVU in an hour. We need to talk about 'A'.**

"Guess we should get going." She muttered, tossing her phone on the bed before looking at her father with concern. "Are you alright?" She asked, taking in the anger starting to simmer in his coffee-brown eyes.

Rafael nodded sharply. "I'm just...angry." He hissed through clenched teeth, the muscle in his jaw ticking with the effort. "I'm supposed to be able to protect you, and yet you have some psycho gunning for you."

"A disturbed individual, Counsellor." Carina chided, trying for humor to lighten the mood. "Frustration is no excuse for layman's terms."

"Damn it, Carina! This isn't funny!" Rafael shouted and she backed up a step.

Carina swallowed. "You don't think I know that?" She countered, voice thick. "I'm scared – hell, I'm terrified. But in case you haven't noticed, I'm not the only one in this family receiving death threats." Crossing her arms over her chest, she stared him down. "And don't lecture me on being flippant about it, Mr. I Didn't Tell Anyone For Ten Months."

Rafael opened his mouth to argue, but closed it, realizing his daughter was right – he had hid the fact that he'd been receiving death threats for ten months before finally telling Liv. "Lo odio cuando tienes razón. (I hate it when you're right.)" He muttered, sighing heavily.

"Well tough." Carina teased and ruffled a hand through her hair before looking at her father who lingered in the doorway. "Dad?" She prompted softly.

Rafael shook his head, rolling his shoulders back and cracking his neck. "We can grab breakfast on the way." He stated distractedly and left the room.

* * *

"Something tells me I better get used to being here." Carina muttered as she and her father pushed through the doors of the station house, following the hallway down to the squad room SVU was allocated to. "I mean...get reused to being here most of the time." She corrected, clearly remembering the long hours she and Rafael had spent here after she'd been rescued from her grandfather.

Rafael sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, already feeling the beginnings of a massive migraine building just behind his eyes. "Welcome to my life." He commented blithely as they entered the squad room.

"Counsellor, back so soon?" Carisi teased from his spot at his desk, a rubber band ball being tossed back and forth in his hands. "Miss me already?"

"You're giving yourself a lot of credit there, Detective." Rafael rolled his eyes, his voice taking on its usual snide tone. "All that night school going to your head?"

Carina shook her head, licking her lips nervously. "I'm assuming you all saw the photo?" She leaned back casually against Mike's desk, appearing completely nonchalant about the whole thing, running her gaze around the squad room.

"Well, it's not really anything new." Amanda said, laughing lightly at Rafael's confused look. "I remember when it showed up on my Instagram feed. Some three and a half million people liked it." She grinned at the amused look Carina gave her. "Yes, I follow you on Instagram."

Nick smirked, leaning back in his chair. "I think we all follow you on some form of social media." He shook his head. "Zara keeps begging me to get her a phone so she can follow you too. I mean, you're only her favorite person ever. Or so she says."

Carina grinned as her father shook his head, adjusting the grip on his briefcase as he watched Liv enter the squad room, dusting snowflakes out of her hair. "Oh good, you're here." Liv muttered as she shrugged out of her coat before hanging it up in her office. "We need to talk about that photo."

"We know that whoever 'A' is pulled it from her Instagram feed. So, no surprise there." Mike stated matter-of-factly as he crossed his arms over his chest. "And we can't exactly interrogate all 6 million plus followers Carina has."

Liv nodded, a small furrow appearing between her brows as she thought to herself, fiddling with her necklaces to keep her hands busy. "I'd feel better if TARU were able to monitor your social media, but they're stretched thin as it is with monitoring your phone and the apartment." She sighed and shook her head.

A contemplative silence fell over the squad room before being shattered by Carina's phone going off and being replaced with palpable tension.

 **Just a reminder – photoshoot and interview with us in an hour. – Seventeen**

Carina smiled and laughed lightly. "Relax guys, it's just a reminder that I have to be at Seventeen magazine in an hour." She tucked her phone away as she ruffled a hand through her hair.

"There's something else we need totalkabout." Liv said evenly as her gaze landed on Carina and Rafael. "1PP and the "Brass" have decided that since the death threats towards you both haven't been acted upon, they no longer warrant full-time protection detail." She paused and shook her head, clearly disappointed with the politics of the whole situation. "As of right now, you no longer have police protection."

* * *

 **Here is the second chapter my lovelies :) Please read and review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Quaintrelle**

 **(noun) a woman who emphasizes a life of passion, expressed through personal style, leisurely pastimes, charm, and cultivation of life's pleasures**

Carina stuffed her hands into the pockets of her coat, sighing heavily as she scuffed one booted foot along the cheap tiled floor of the squad room. "Well that's just…great." She breathed out a self-deprecating laugh. "I've hating being followed around for the past four months, and the Brass decides to take it away when I need it the most."

"We'll protect you." Olivia stated firmly, giving Carina a warm if tight smile. "It's been slow here, and I think we'd all feel better if at least one of us was with you." She said as she glanced around at the others who nodded in agreement, catching the grateful look from Barba out of the corner of her eye. "Then it's decided – Carisi and Dodds will shadow you this week."

Barba flexed his hand around the handle of his briefcase before adjusting the knot in his tie. "Well, I need to get down to the courthouse. I still have a pile of files waiting for me on my desk." He muttered, sighing through his nose as Carina tossed him the keys to her Audi. "I need an assistant." He grumbled.

Carina rolled her eyes affectionately, shaking her head in mock exasperation. "I'm your assistant, Papí. And I will help you with those files the moment," She pulled out her phone and scrolled through her emails. "Seventeen, MarieClaire and Lucky are done with me."

The groups gazes flicked to her as her phone beeped with an incoming text, worry immediately creasing Barba and Liv's brow.

 **Bet you miss her every day. Imagine what mommy would think if she saw how you turned out. - A**

Below the text a screenshot of the picture of Carina's mother from the 9/11 Memorial website, her father had taken it the night before September 11, 2001. Her mother was smiling, brown eyes shining with her dark hair pushed back from her face. Her father told her that her mother hadn't been looking at him when he took the photo, but of little, one month old her that he'd been balancing on one hip.

She jumped as her phone beeped again, blinking tears out of her eyes before looking down to read the text.

 **SVU can't protect you forever, Carina. I hope you like my gift. Kisses – A**

"What gift?" Amanda muttered as she peered over Carina's shoulder to get a look at the screen as the others gathered closer.

"Delivery for Carina Barba." A new voice interjected and Carina let out a startled yelp before turning to face the embarrassed delivery man. "Sorry about that. Sign here please." He apologized, passing over the electronic signature system which Carina signed with a quick flourish.

Amaro frowned, rubbing his jaw with one hand. "I'm not liking where this is going." He muttered ominously.

"I didn't like where this was going when it started yesterday." Rafael said lowly, the muscle in his jaw ticking from how hard he was clenching his teeth.

Carina brushed a few stray tears from her cheeks and composed herself before snatching a letter opener from the cup on Carisi's desk, slicing through the packing tape on the box with deadly efficiency.

"Lo que la mierda real? (What the actual fuck?)" Carina swore, ignoring the hissed reprimand from her father as she held open the flaps of the box so the others could see.

Inside was an almost perfect replica of the Barba's living room in their apartment at One Madison. There were little clay figurines of the squad who stood around another figurine that lay on the ground surrounded by what assumingly was supposed to be a pool of blood. Another figurine that Carina assumed was supposed to be herself sat in the far corner of the room, a horrified expression on the figurine's clay features.

A folded piece of stationary was tucked into one corner of the box and Carina lifted it out with shaky hands, already dreading the message awaiting her as she unfolded it.

 **[Daddy isn't safe just because you're the target now. You think you're safe on the outside, but you're not when I'm on the inside. – A]**

"Well that's just…sick." Fin breathed as Liv took the box from Carina's hands. "One of us should stay with Barba. Now that it's clear that this nut isn't just gunning for Carina."

Carina nodded, resisting the urge to bite her nails. "I don't – Should I cancel my schedule?" She asked, eyes questioning as she turned to her father. "Wouldn't it be better to give 'A' fewer opportunities to get at me?"

"But you also don't want 'A' to think that you're running scared." Amanda pointed out, brushing her bangs out of her eyes. "Not to mention the media storm that you withdrawing from the public eye would cause." She continued and sighed, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Okay…so I keep doing everything the same. Go to school – when it starts, keep to my schedule and giving my fans what they want." Carina muttered, running a hand through her hair. "Okay, okay…I can do this." She breathed, before sighing heavily. "Why can't anything in my life ever be normal?"

Liv gave her a one-armed hug, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "I'll talk to Chief Dodds about getting your protective detail reinstated. Maybe Tucker can call in some favors." She murmured, a mix of determination and anger etched into her features. "And we'll have TARU look into how this 'A' replicated your living room."

"If nothing else I can try and guilt trip him into it." Mike added, earning a tight laugh from Barba who gave him what could've been classified as a grateful look. "So which one of us is going with who?" He asked, looking to Olivia.

"Umm…Dodds you can stick with Carina and Carisi you go with Barba." Benson instructed, sighing through her nose as she pulled out her phone to make the call to Chief Dodds. "Everyone stay safe and be smart."

Carisi grinned, thrilled that he was finally going to have some extended one-on-one time with Barba. Maybe he could extra credit for shadowing an ADA? "Maybe I can help you get through those files Carina was talking about." He offered, grabbing his coat from the back of his desk jack and shrugging in on.

Carina gave Carisi a small, but fond smile at the exasperated look on her father's face. "Juega bien. (Play nice.) And, text me, when you get back to the courthouse." She said, watching as Dodds buttoned up his coat before wrapping his scarf around his neck. Did Liv purposefully pair her father and her with their respective crushes? Carina wouldn't put it past her. Liv was sneaky like that.

"I will." Rafael replied distractedly, still eyeing the creepy diorama resting on Nick's desk as the detective replaced the lid and began filling out the appropriate evidence form.

"Promise me, Papí." Carina implored, hazel eyes just this side of pleading as they held her father's brown ones. "Please. I need to know that you're safe…" She paused, her eyes flicking over to Carisi. "That you're both safe."

Rafael nodded, giving her a tight smile. "I promise, cariño." He replied honestly. "Now, do you want to take the car or…?"

"You take it." Carina tossed him the fob for the Audi. "It's probably better if we use one of the precinct cars." She gave a slightly exasperated sigh. "What with them being less recognizable and all that."

"And there's that genius brain I've heard so much about." Nick teased affectionately, laughing off the last of the lingering tension at the playful eye roll Carina gave him.

Carina gave him a half-hearted glare. "I will feed you to my model friends." She threatened, full lips curling a devilish smile. "I know some of them would just love to get their hands on you."

"Now that just sounds terrifying." Fin muttered and Carina cackled, making grabby hands at him. "Don't you have somewhere to be?"

"I'm going, I'm going…" Carina held up her hands in mock surrender, before extending a hand to Mike. "Shall we, Sergeant Dodds?' She winked at him. "The fashion industry waits for no one."


End file.
